This is Barry Sanders. Also known as "B", "Boo", "BooBoos" and "BARRY SANDERS MCCONNELL" when he's escaping from the stadium or peeing on the field.
This is also Barry Sanders. But for the topic of this blog, we are going to be discussing the aforementioned Sanders.
BARRY SANDERS
Born: July 1, 2013
Drafted: September 5, 2013
Team: McConnell
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Barry grew up in Ohio the first 8 weeks of his life. After weening from his mother, he began working on developing his agility skills of running, jumping and chasing inanimate objects. These skills, along with his natural gift of cuteness provided him the opportunity to be drafted to the McConnell Organization where he yielded a signing fee of $500. Unfortunately, because he was new to the team, he was not awarded pedigree papers which would have allotted him a much higher salary.
Once part of the McConnell Organization, his new head coach and legendary veteran of the game, Angela McConnell, wasted no time in starting his training. It had been rumored that Sanders had not been properly potty trained and McConnell wasn't about to take any chances on acquiring a stained field. McConnell had enlisted the help of Sanders' team mates, but, at the time, they were more interested in Sanders' ability to catch a ball than to help acclimate him to the organization's culture. After several weeks, Sanders not only was able to pee and poop outside, he had also obtained the dexterity to ring a bell on the door announcing his need to run. From that time on, Barry loved to run.
As Sanders became familiar with his team, he learned to run and juke like no other dog the McConnell's had ever seen. It did not take Sanders long to secure the MVP Award in his first season with the McConnell's, something that had never been done before in the MFL (McConnell Family League). His career has continued to gain traction these past seven years and he has continued to lead his team to several winning seasons and with Barry still in his prime, the Super Dog Bowl is not out of reach. Sanders is known for his ability to breakout of a huddle and run for the stands, taunting his opponents to try and catch him. It is only through his team mates enticement of treats that he will consider returning to the stadium. Treats play a big role in Sanders' game. For the right treat he is known to produce a 30 inch vertical from a 4 paw stance.
Away from the field, however, Sanders, has not been without controversy. He has earned a reputation for being an extremely picky eater and refuses to eat his food out of the bowl. His peculiar eating habits are said to have come from a childhood trauma where his food bowl became perilously attached to his collar and had to be removed by a human. This event is said to have caused him PTSD and thus, he, now kicks his food out onto the floor, away from his food bowl where he proceeds to eat each pebble one at a time. Head Coach McConnell, chooses to overlook Sanders' issue and the extra work in cleaning that it produces due to the God-given talent that he brings to the game.
Barry Sanders is an ALL American Dog. He has single-handedly changed the McConnell Organization and it's players. He will go down in MFL history and will in all likelyhood be inducted into the Hall of Canine before his career is over. He has also just been announced to be on the home screen of McConnell iPHONE 11 for 2020. Barry Sanders is a king among the wolves and has stolen the hearts of his team mates and his fans and he is undoubtedly the greatest canine to ever play the game.
"But ask the animals and they will teach you..."
Job 12:7
