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The Elephant Is Alive and Well

Updated: Jan 12, 2020

I'm pulling the elephant out of the closet and giving him a seat at the dinner table. So you better make room. It's something that I need to be up front about with my Christian friends (and anyone else for that matter) so that they can decide if they still want to journey with me. As we peel through this onion together, I want to be real with you; just as I am real with God. I believe authenticity is the key ingredient that defines truth.

So here it is...



Yep, there's nothing like a well placed "shit!" after I've dropped and shattered the pickle jar on the floor. And if I step on a shard piece of glass and cut myself, you better believe I'll be dropping an "f" bomb! I'm a passionate, feisty gal and I swear. Why? Because sometimes I just need a little more colorful word that has some oomph to it when I'm expressing my thoughts and feelings!

Now, before I'm called a blasphemer, let me share my truth about curse words. The Bible has all types of scripture that addresses cursing, using unwholesome talk and bridling of the tongue, but it does not give examples of what specific words are considered sinful. Why is that? I believe it's because it's not the word itself that carries the sin, it's the persuasion of the heart behind it. It's the heart that is judged, "...People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart," 1Samuel 16:7. It's the heart that dictates what the true meaning of the word is. You can tell someone whom you are angry with to "Go 'SPOON' off!" and if the intent of your heart towards that person in that moment is malicious than it doesn't actually matter what particular word you use; spoon or f**k. Congratulations, you succeeded in offending them irregardless. The same is true if you're trying to express joy or give a compliment. Telling someone they are f**king talented has no ill will or proposed transgression attached to it, it's simply another version of saying that person is amazing at their craft.

So why not just say it the second way? Because it is the way in which we, as a society, articulates; its our urban dialect. The swear words of today are our cultures vernacular. They are used in everyday language to express anger, excitement, pain, confusion; the list of emotions goes on indefinitely. We use these words to communicate. And Yes, these words can also be used to hurt and offend, but in reality, so can any word.

The bible talks about not using words or speech that defile. It doesn't specify particular words that defile because there are many words that can defile, not just swear words. Defile means to corrupt, taint, or pollute and I would challenge that when you gossip or lie about someone you are most definitely defiling them by tainting their reputation and causing the other person to think unfavorably about them. And you can easily do it without ever uttering one f**k from your lips.

The bottom line is that I wholeheartedly agree that "Death and life are in the power of the tongue," Proverbs 18:21. I also believe that if you use a swear word in an offensive manner than it is indeed sinful. My point is simply that it is not only the word that we speak, but ultimately the motivation of the heart prompting it. "For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks", Luke 6:45. Going forward, I want to be clear that it is and will never be my intent to offend anyone. As we journey through this onion, layer by layer, it is my life's true passion to love and encourage those of us who need hope. But in order for me to do that I have to be me; the real me; wholly, emphatically, authentically me...which comes with the occasional swear word attached! And let me answer the question that's running through your mind right now. Yes; I swear when I'm talking with God, too.


But before you want to throw me and my elephant back in the closet, listen to my story on my podcast and you'll glean a greater insight into what my real relationship with God looks like and just how infinite His love really is!

"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear."

Ephesians 5:4

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